I need to shower and to bath him again. I am just trying to sleep when he sleeps, but he wakes to get changed then wakes to eat and they are not at the same time. It is good he's gaining weight and needing frequent diaper changes, but it makes sleep more elusive. Especially at night. He is wide awake at night for some reason. It is disconcerting and I want to hold him and play with him when awake, but I'm so tired. I feel sad because I am missing out on him growing and playing with him because I'm so tired. He's already getting bigger. I weighed him 2 days ago at 10.8 lbs. His next doctor visit is next week and he'll be one month old already!!!
How long does this eating every 1.5-3 hours last? I hope not forever. The dental society Christmas party is on this Friday and I don't know if I'll be awake enough to go. I want to go and share this happy baby with pictures, but I also want to sleep and eat. I also want to be there for him when he needs to eat. I do not want to expose him to many people right now either. He does not need to get sick. Eventually I know he'll get a cold or something else, but he has enough on his plate right now.
He blows air or raspberries when he's falling asleep or is dreaming or waking up. He's so funny that way. He smiles with his eyes closed after eating or while sleeping sometimes. He is good at tummy time, but cries because he wants to be held rather than hold his head up and see just his immediate surroundings rather than walking around.
I am sending out Christmas cards with his picture for an announcement rather than sending out two cards. I have to do that sometime, but I do not know when that will be possible. In the middle of the night I have no energy and during the day I am trying to sleep or get something done, like the laundry or eating. I am so thankful for Tony. He's been making the food and allowing me to sleep when he gets home from work. He's a pro at changing diapers. We miss each other though with the lack of time we get to spend together. He's taking all the stress of working, not sleeping because he hears every time Adam wakes and screams, cooking, running errands, changing diapers while I sleep, take out the trash, etc. He's very helpful, but I feel bad I cannot do more to help him and to spend more time with him. We have not slept in the same room, but once in about 3 months. Being married usually means you get to be together, but this is not the funnest. I would love to think we can get Adam on a schedule, but that seems to be more in the future than any time soon. I hear it can be 6-8 weeks before he sleeps longer at night.
On a good note my blood pressure is in a normal range. Not normal for me yet, but it is going in the right direction. I am getting headaches daily and that is a side effect of the medicine I am taking. It could be worse, but I hope my blood pressure stays equalized once I am off of the medicine. I would be very upset if it rises again. I am hopeful that will not be a problem. People are already asking me when we will have our next baby. I need a couple of years to recover from this one and the prospect of being older and having this potentially happen again is scary to me. I think I'm going to enjoy this time and think about having a second baby in the future, not now. This precious boy gets all of my attention.
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