Studying feels like slipping on that favorite old T-shirt

  I have been back to the basics this last week.  I am back to using mechanical pencils, ball point pens and yellow highlighters.  I got the pleasure of using the new sturdy Post it page markers so I can turn to a section without tearing or tugging on the page too much.  I love office supplies as it is, but getting to be productive using them is even better.  I have been loving reading the material, doing homework, taking quizzes and exams on the information.  I just can't get enough study time.  I think it is time well spent and anything else I could have been doing seems less important.

  The pressure of a deadline is a little anxiety inducing, but there could be no accomplishment without an end to demonstrate success.  I love going into an exam.  The smell of the paper, the feel of eraser being wiped away, the time ticking away, the sound of the pencil writing furiously.  At the end of an exam, I typically do not know exactly what my score will be.  Myself being my worst critic, I do not usually come out of an exam with the feeling of acing it, mostly I feel relieved that it is over.  Despite that, the anticipation of my score is more excitement than apprehension.  Always liking school and being in my element in academia, the feeling is fun and close to my heart.  Being the perpetual student, I never know where learning will take me. I know this year will be different than any other in my life and that is exciting to me.

  Getting to the end of this test, I wish I could just get it over with.  I know that once I pass I can move on to the learning of how the business actually works rather than just an abstract and literal view that learning the information brings.  In applying what I learned comes understanding and even better, possibly getting paid.  Ultimately that is the goal is to pay the bills.  Being out of work for so long has definitely been a drain on my patience, sense of security and resources.  I know my earnings will be meager for the first 1-3 years, but I look forward to the challenge and to work with different people I otherwise may not have had the opportunity to meet.  Always in a transition, real estate will keep me on my toes for certain.  Keeping things interesting, I am hoping will not get old.   I hope people will work with me and not just look at my baby face and say that I am too young.  I know when I am 50 years old the baby face will come in handy.  Good news yesterday, I hope there is good news tomorrow, in the form of a pass the test.  I cannot see around this corner yet, but I know I will make it around the bend.